True Stories From My Weird Life

These are all 100% true (well, maybe 96% true) stories that will stick with me till the day I die.

“The 2007 Helen Keller Middle School Foodfight”

“I Ate 67 Saltines In a Row” This one is pretty self-explanatory.

“Small Children Frighten Me” I wrote this after my first day working as a camp counselor at a Lego stop-motion camp. Not as fun as it sounds.

“My First Karaoke Left Me Very Confused”

“The Time I Got My School Bus Pulled Over By the Police” Also pretty self-explanatory.

“Dental Dam(nation)” The result of my interaction with some seriously annoying femi-Nazis.

“Awkward Encounters: The Sidewalk”

“Awkward Encounters: The Laundry Room”

“CROSSFIT, UNGH, OH YEAAAH” I did Crossfit for all of about three weeks. Then I realized I was more comfortable doing sit-ups at home.

“Sweet Dreams” This is by far the angriest rant I have ever gone on before- mostly because it involves sleeping and me not doing that.


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